Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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