..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
