Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Randomize
