Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Randomize
