pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Randomize
