Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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