Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
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