Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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