Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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