I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Randomize
