When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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