The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
