I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
We need to get me chipped asap
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Randomize
