when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
