Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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