You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
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