Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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