Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
we're so committed to being not committed
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
