i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize
