I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
