shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Randomize
