Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
