Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
babies were throwing up all over the place
I've blown a few things in my day
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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