I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
