uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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