she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Randomize
