Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Randomize