But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
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