it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
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