It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
