that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
