windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
I party with great urgency now.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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