Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize