ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize