think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
