Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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