I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
