so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
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