is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
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