Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
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