Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Randomize
