So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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