There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Randomize
