she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
