Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
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