we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
