apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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