you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Randomize
