so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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