How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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